It almost feels healthy to start a new blog. I'm not saying that my last one was bad or anything but I was just so tired of everyone getting on it and yelling at me. This one it free to the world. The little wonderers of the internet can find this and enjoy it but for the most part I don't plan on letting anyone I know see it. I feel like I need to start this blog out with a new revelation of something but in all reality it was sort of made out of desperation for the new.
I mean I guess I cant start this out with the fact of me trying to come to terms with change. Like most people I really hate change with a passion. Coming home from college I expected to have all my friends here the same and nothing changed. I guess though like me they changed and I have yet to be able to accept that.
There were the big changes like Buzbee who lost his innocence and found his way. This one kills me the most because I never expected one of my best friends to change so much. He was my rock and I always expected him to stay that way. He's almost unrecognizable now and I don't know really how to cope with the loss of the boy who actually wanted to listen to my sorrows.
Then there was the silent but subtle changes that only become more clear the more time that I spend with the person. I never though Sierra would change. It's not like she left and went on her own. Though now that I sit and think about it she had to change. All or most of her friends left and went to school. Her sister left and so did her friends that stayed here. She was on her own to finally decide what she wanted to be and who she wanted to be. Shes starting a career that'll continue to take her everywhere. I can wrap my mind around the fact that this caused her to change so much but Sierras always been one of those people that'll go do what she wants.
I can't really say much for my other friends. I guess they changed slightly but not enough to actually show a difference. Within the last few days I think I've made some wrongs and the only way to fix them is to suck up my pride and apologize. In the back of my mind I know theirs the possibility that its not gonna change anything but I will feel like the better person. I don't have to be in charge for me to be better. I just have to have an acceptance and a true understanding of what going on.
